The Mayo Conspiracy


Written & directed by Anthony J. Vollmer & Craig Horwitz

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Foodies Need to Beware of Fillers

Why would anyone in their right mind be pro-fillers? They dilute taste and hence, they dilute life. Well guess what, that is yet another evil role of mayonnaise: The Great diluter of Life . Case and point: horse radish sauce. If you are fan of the hot roast beef sandwich on a Kaiser roll, you will probably ask for some horse radish. (which is worthy of the utmost respect) Unfortunately, some restaurants may secretly replace their horse radish with something called “horse radish sauce.“ So you need to ask up-front if they are diluting their horse radish because, and I do not mean to start a wide spread panic here, it is diluted with mayo!!! If the dilution take place in-house, then you still might be able to receive 100% pure Columbian horse radish before it gets infected. So speak up! However, they might be using store brand horse radish sauce , which has already reached the point of no return. Another danger area: crab cakes. Now a true seafood place almost always uses pure crab meat but if you are ordering your cakes in a bar atmosphere, you must check if they are using fillers. You see, the most common filler for crab cakes is, once again, mayo. And as disgusting as mayo is cold, can you imagine what it is like heated up? Okay the thought of that is about to make me blow some chunks so hold on from this post for a second……..BLEH……..RALPH…… Okay, I’m back and feeling much better. Must think happy, mayo-free thoughts. Anyway from the supply side perspective, I can see the economic incentive for a restaurant to contaminate their recipes with fillers since it makes the food go a longer way. But it is still a crime against humanity so we need to put pressure on the demand side by staying away from these restaurants, at least until they change their evil ways. On a positive note, this blog needs to give props to a bar/restaurant called Mike’s York Street Bar and Grill . They are located in Warminster, PA and they do not fall way to the dark side with their crab cakes. If you know of any true crab cake places, esepcially from a bar, then post away and let’s help them out for doing the right thing.

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