The Mayo Conspiracy


Written & directed by Anthony J. Vollmer & Craig Horwitz

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Hash Browns vs. Home fries: I am drawing a line in the sand, where do you stand?

Since the beginning of time, mankind  (as well as womankind) has been torn by breakfast side dishes. You either stand on the Hash Browns team or the Home Fries one. There is really no middle ground. In fact, back in medieval times , you could have your hand cut off by merely ordering Hash Browns in a Home Fries stronghold. And it was this polarization that led to the lack of choice in diners across America. Finding a breakfast establishment that offers both sides is certainly a needle in a haystack. Although Holdthatmayo.com has officially endorsed hash browns (less greasy, crispier brown texture at the top, more fun to eat) we respect Home Fries' right to exist and would like to see more choice offered. So if any foodies out there can report back on a restaurant offering Home Fries and Hash Browns as options or if you can convince your favorite diner to offer both sides, I will gladly link out to their web site from this blog. Also, if you happen to reside in HomeFries-land, I encourage you to state your case in the comments section.  

One can make a similar comparison to Clam Chowder. Nobody will offer both New England and Manhattan.  Even more sad, restaurants lean dis-proportionally towards the New England side, even though Manhattan is clearly the superior chowder. (more vegetables, spicier, more interesting broth)  By the way, this dish originated in Rhode Island during the late 19th century, when Portuguese immigrants added tomatoes to their chowder. British New Englanders mistakenly believed their creamy chowder to be superior and named the Portuguese version after Manhattan. (presuming that New Yorkers were the only people crazy enough to add tomatoes) Ironcially, it is very tough today to find Manhattan chowder, even in New York these days.  Why not just offer both and make everyone happy? That's the million dollar question my clam-consuming friends. And the billion dollar question is where did the expression “happy as a clam” come from??? Why are clams so damn happy? They can't communicate with their fellow clams; they can't see; they can't even have sex. I submit that clams are the most miserable species in the sea and it is probably  the highest honor in the clam community to sacrifice themselves for the good  of the  chowder. (we can only hope and pray it was for a bowl of Manhattan style)

I'd love to hear about your chowder experiences !

Happy eating,

Craig

6 comments to Hash Browns vs. Home fries: I am drawing a line in the sand, where do you stand?

  • Anonymous

    I love home fries, and I hate hash browns. Home fries in my house hold are definitely the easier dish to make, plus they have tons of dices of greeen & red peppers, onions, and spices that make them way yummier than a plain old hash brown. Sure, you could take the time to add these things to the plain old hash brown, but it'll take longer. If you are a fan of a Rachel Ray's 30 minute meals (I know I am!), than this is the faster dish to make. What's easier than cutting open a frozen foods bag, pouring a little EVO in a pan, and turning on the flame? The work is done for you and it's ready in just ten minutes! You might be able to buy hash browns frozen, but I still think it would take alot longer to thaw when cooking them, plus they are disgusting. Eating a hash brown reminds me of eating cut-up pieces of coconut. I don't like the texture of a hash brown one bit. Even if you add all the spices and peppers in the world to them, I do not like hash browns!!!

  • Anonymous

    I hate hash browns TOO!

  • Anonymous

    i like scrapple

  • Anonymous

    LOL Scrapple!
    Country Griddle in Flemington NJ gives you a choice between home fries and hash browns.
    I can go either way depending on my mood. Sometimes I have to have the crispy goodness of hash browns, but if I'm hungry and feel like making a mess, it's home fries all the way!

  • Anonymous

    The Oyster Bar in Grand Central Terminal in New York City serves both Manhattan and New England Clam Chowder
    http://www.oysterbarny.com/pdf/dailymenu.pdf

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